I wonder how many times you fail to do something simply because to try is just too much effort?
Or because you are in “that place” again where doing anything, thinking anything, attempting anything is just too big a stretch for you?
But even more than that I wonder how many times you have felt forced to make excuses, to lie, or create some falsehood or some diversion away from the real reason why you didn’t do it, go there, participate?
Where other people’s expectations, or their inability or seemingly dogged unwillingness to understand creates for you either a silence where your voice simply isn’t worth using as it won’t be heard or a world of conflict where telling the truth simply doesn’t seem an option?
In my own situation, having hidden my physical and mental health issues for most of my life I suddenly had a full mental and physical breakdown back in 1999 and as a result of that the “cat was very much out of the bag” as they say.
Since then I have pretty much refused to hide my mental health issues and I have tried, where possible to be fairly open about them with most people that I meet on a regular basis and with whom I am likely to have any noteworthy relationship.
But here’s the deal. I am now 51 years old and I live alone and have very few people to whom I have to answer, or indeed care for on a one to one daily basis. And with that comes tremendous freedom.
But I recognize that not everyone has that same freedom and that my circumstances are quite unusual. I don’t face the same social pressures that many of us face.
But what about those who do? What about those for whom those things that I spoke about above – the hiding, the shame, the ridicule – the stigma is still so very real?
I cam across this video and it really spoke to me. I hope and pray it speaks to you also.