Tags
Bipolar Disorder, Christianity, Christianity and Depression, Christianity and Mental Health, Depression, Distorted Perceptions, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Personal Journal
Well I saw the psychiatrist today.
I thought that since all I seem to have done over the past few weeks is complete the 30 day challenge each week and work on my books, it was time for a real and normal post 🙂
And today was, as I have mentioned my appointment to see the psychiatrist. I hadn’t seen one since way back in June and so wasn’t sure what to expect.
Actually (and thankfully) the psychiatrist I saw was nothing like the one in the clipart above 🙂 Instead it was a female psychiatrist from the french part of Canada and she was extremely nice and very approachable.
I will be honest with you here. Sadly, as a Christian with mental health issues, there are two types of people with whom I have learned to be hesitant about discussing my faith and mental health in the same conversation.
Psychiatrist and some Christians. And again sadly, I am sure I don’t have to labor the reasons why.
Go to a psychiatrist as some one who hears voices and share that you speak to God and three things will immediately rise. Their interest, their eyebrows and their pen.
Go to some Christians as someone who believes in and hears God and admit that you hear voices and instant diagnoses of demon possession and the need for immediate deliverance will result.
But thank fully the psychiatrist I saw today, although having her own faith, did neither of those things and we were able to have a sensible cohesive conversation with each other which included aspects of my faith. And trust me, since my faith is core to who I am, and thus no amount of help will be effective unless recognizing and respecting that, it was a welcomed change.
As a result of this I also fessed up to my struggles over my medication. My memory and focus difficulties often mean that I would forget to take my meds – folk who know me well will know the struggles that I have with these things – memory, focus and taking my meds.
Subsequently on realizing that I have forgotten to take my meds I would then decide to deliberately not take my meds, believing that since I haven’t taken them and seem ok I must not therefore need them.
Of course the keywords in that statement being “seem ok”, and often I am not ok. But I guess I am not alone in this and that others will be able to relate.
One difficulty is of course that in the past i have been medicated to such a degree that I am effectively being chemically lobotomized. Something I never want to experience as it affords no quality of life worth living and removes my ability to function let alone worship.
But we discussed this, the psychiatrist and I, and I have agreed to an increase in the dose of my psych meds on the condition that I retain control over whether or not I continue with the increase subject top giving it an adequate period of review.
I have to tell you, and I mean no disrespect to other psychiatric professionals here, but it is so refreshing to walk away from a consult actually feeling that you have been listened to and heard and that the primary purpose was not just the ticking of boxes and pushing of pills.
God is so good!
Yes, He is good!! And I am so very glad you saw a good psychiatrist, which is a rare find indeed!! I, too, know the pitfalls of discussing my faith and having “the look” come upon the professional’s face upon learning I hear the voice of God and the devil. I learned quickly not to share that unless I want to be diagnosed with something I do not have.
May God bless the meds and give you the wisdom to know if the increase is right for you or not.
Love,
Kathy
Hey Kathy,
Yes our psychiatrists are so snowed under with clients these days aren’t they? I seriously believe that, generally speaking, our psychiatrists are forced into an ethos of crisis prevention rather than condition management or help.
I praise God for the psych I saw today. She wasn’t exactly of the same faith as we are but I still praise God for her.
Many thanks for the prayers my sweet sister.
Hope you are well? I really have been so busy trying to edit my books that I haven’t had the time to follow blogs and comment as much as I would like. It is a huge task to do alone. But I promise once this mammoth task is over I will get back to it all and in the meantime can simply apologize.
Kind regards and God bless you my precious sister.
Kevin.
No apologies necessary, Kevin. I’m just so happy for you that your books are being published!! 😀 I owe you and several others a long email, but have been struggling so it hasn’t happened . . . but it will!!
No worries Sis,
Write when you are able and know you are loved even when not able 🙂
Hope that makes sense?
Kind Regards and God bless you.
Kevin
Thank you, Kevin!! It does make sense and the same goes from me to you!! 🙂
I am glad you found someone that understands all aspects of the illness.
Hey Carla,
Great to hear from you again.
Yes it really was a blessing and much needed one at that 🙂
Kind regards and God bless you.
Kevin.
Am struggling with this myself, Kevin, and have sought answers and will talk to my psych. Meanwhile have been working on a piece that is very related to what you write but cannot find a title and am struggling despite some sort of viral thing that hubby and I have. And have taken a job making handmade cards for three stores. One is Riverside Church gift shop which I am happy about and I am happy about this in general since my way of witnessing God is through my writing and my art.
Very glad you got a good psych. Good for you for fessing up. I don’t always because I don’t want to see that look that dear Kathy writes about but I don’t advocate doing what I do. Let’s hope and pray for the best with the meds. Believe me, I know about chemical lobotomies and the effects.
God bless you,
Ellen
Hey Ellen 🙂
Great to hear from you.
I will be very interested to read the piece you are writing but am sorry you and hubby have a viral thing. I have one going on at the moment too, albeit that it has just started.
I am extremely excited to hear about the job you have taken making handmade cards for three stores, especially the Riverside Church gift shop. I think using our gifts is so important!
I too was delighted with my psych visit today and the fact that I fessed up. Accountability is very important to me although I have no doubt I will catch it from my adopted parents when they read the blog or ask me how the appointment went LOL
Kind Regards and God bless you,
Kevin
Hey Kevin,
Sorry you’re sick, too, and hope you feel better real soon!! I hope you don’t mind but I posted my piece that I thought would interest you and I used the phrase from your title, “Chemical Lobotomy”, as a tag. I love that concept but I guess it is not original to you?? Anyhow here is the url for the post (with misspelling, which I just corrected, and all):
http://stockdalewolfe.com/2012/12/04/mounring-mania-and-the-only-path-to-take/
When and if you go there to read it, take a look at “Lamb in the Manger”– I think you will relate. But please don’t feel you have to look right away or even at all. I understand not feeling well enough to do things. It is hard enough fighting depression or mania and other states without having to fight our physical bodies as well.
God bless you and make you better in mind and body,
Ellen
P.S. Thanks for being happy about my card job. It is sort of free lance– not a real job, still thanks.
Hey Ellen,
I loved the post! I am a wee bit tired tonight so will re-read it n the morning but just wanted to let you know that I did love what I have read.
Kind Regards and God bless you.
Kevin
Kevin,
Thanks for reading but rest up, eh! Glad you liked the post. I hope you will take care of yourself and rest up while not feeling well. A piece by Bipolar author, Alistair McHarg really inspired this piece but looks like you and I are thinking along similar lines. Hope you feel better.
God bless you, Kevin,
Ellen
Hey Ellen.
I am so full of flu this morning it is unreal; which concerns me a little as last time I had it this bad this fast I ended up in hospital again.
So lots of rest, fluids and linctus for me this time 🙂
Hope you are well and I certainly will be re-reading the post once my head is a little clearer.
Kind Regards and God bless you
Kevin.
Dearest Kevin,
The flu is so debilitating and really knocks you out and engenders depression because you feel so physically helpless. Please do stay in bed and be good to yourself. Don’t worry about your blog or 30 day challenge or anything. Priority is getting well and staying out of hospital. I wish I could send you some of the herbal supplements and essential oils we use. What I can do for you is a distant 15 minute Reiki session. Have you heard of Reiki? Don’t bother responding now to anything I write. Rest and we can talk about it when you are hopefully better!
God bless you and help you heal,
Ellen
Sounds like a wonderful consult! I have a hard time finding a PDoc that listens and doesn’t rush me out of the room in 30seconds. Glad yours was a productive visit where you walked away with some satisfaction… ♥
Hey Muse:)
Great to hear from you.
Yes it is extremely hard to find the right PDoc and van be very frustrating but I am so glad that today went well for me.
Hope you are well
Kind Regards and God bless you
Kevin
Hi Dad,
So glad you had such a positive experience with the psychiatrist (it’s us Canadian’s..we rock) 🙂
Hope the rest of your day is wonderful. God Bless
Hey Kiddo,
Thanks for getting in touch and yes it really was a great appointment and has lifted and encouraged me. God is good.
Love to you and the boys
Dad